C.J. Braden • 4 Minute Read
Serendipitous Relationships Create Best Friends
This article is dedicated to my great serendipitous friend Clyde, whom I lost in March 2023. I will keep his creative spirit alive in any way I can and empathize with anyone who has lost a close, truly good friend. It stinks knowing you can never call, text or hear their voice again. Thank goodness I saved some of his voicemails and cards. They make me smile.
Best friends have fun together
Some people are in your life for a reason. Some people are meant to be your rock. Some people are meant to make you stronger. Some people are meant to help you through your entire life journey. When you figure out why people certain people are there, it can make your life easier to understand and life, in general, a little easier.
Many of my very good relationships that have helped me through my life journey have been, what I call, serendipitous relationships. Serendipity is the occurrence and development of events by chance in a happy or beneficial way. Some may call them “meeting by chance” relationships, but I sometimes like using the word serendipity to describe them.
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I feel that you often times are blessed to have numerous serendipitous relationships in your life and they should always be treated with kindness, care and attention because they truly are special. They aren’t all necessarily romantic relationships. Many are simply great friendships that occurred by chance.
Marriages often happen between serendipitous relationships
How do you know if you are in a serendipitous relationship? Well, watching the movie Serendipity from 2001 can help explain the romantic version of these types of relationships. If you don’t have time to watch it, SPOILER ALERT- it is the chance, or serendipitous meeting, of Kate and Jonathan (actors Kate Beckinsale and John Cusack) over a glove in a busy department store.
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After a fun evening of getting to know each other, their belief in fate ended up separating them for a while until they serendipitously showed up in each other’s lives again. As a viewer, you may be frustrated that they left so much to fate, but when they find each other again, you understand it is a relationship that will bloom into something wonderful. And you hope they won’t let each other go again.
Mature relationships can grow and become very important to your health
I met my now husband on a random Wednesday night. I was out with one of my best friends at a restaurant/bar recommended by someone that knew their daughter met her husband there. I truly was not looking for a husband (I was only 21 years old) but I ended up finding him that night. I had been single for six months. I dated plenty but nothing was working.
I knew I wanted to find my best friend, not just someone to marry, so this was a huge task. But that night in July 2000, I found my best friend in Tommy at that same restaurant/bar. My friend pushed me up to his table because he was tired of me simply standing by, staring at this blue-eyed mystical creature that I wanted to talk to. I needed to talk to.
Serendipitous friendships tend to adventure together
He called me the next day and we instantly connected on our life goals on our first date, two days after meeting. In June 2023, we will have been married for 20 years, together for 23. Was our meeting serendipitous? I absolutely think so. He’s made my life better and I know I’ve done the same for him. Our lives are better with each other in them.
Unlike the movie Serendipity, I didn’t want to leave my relationship with Tommy to fate, as the movie characters went for years missing each other before so-called fate brought them together again. Life is too short to leave some relationships to fate (or the “universe” or God) to bring them back together.
People for lasting bonds over similar interests
Serendipitous relationships extend out into platonic friendships too. I’ve also had a serendipitous friendship with several individuals that has continued for many years. One of them is the friend that pushed me over to Tommy the night I met him. I’ll always owe him for giving me the courage I needed that night. I made sure to tell him that recently.
I truly believe we were born to be friends. Serendipitous friends. There have been interesting moments in our lives that makes me know this. It seems as if they always drift back into my life, which always aligned with their sad moments, which happened to be my sad moments too.
Great new friendships can occur at any age
Some of my closest friends and I have been in and out of each other’s lives, and one thing I’ve come to know for sure is that my life is better with them in it and I can only hope their life is better with me in theirs. We’ve helped each other reach our dreams and life goals, which I think is part of our purpose in each other’s life. I also don’t have an extremely close or large family, so these kinds of friends feel like family to me. Well, if your real family is awesome. I like choosing my family of friends. I guess that’s why I adore the television show Friends so much.
Good friends hang out with each other as often as possible
That’s what these types of serendipitous relationships are supposed to do. That’s what truly good friends are supposed to do, in general. They lift you up when you are sad. They balance you out. They help you be healthier, happier and overall a better person.
You’ll know if you have a serendipitous relationship in your life because they have a certain energy. The other person puts out “good vibes” that make you want to be around them all the time, even if it’s not possible. You are happy to hear from them, you share silly thoughts, sad thoughts and deep thoughts with them with no regret because you know they’ll get it and won’t judge you. It’s a two-sided, healthy and close friendship that encourages positivity, no matter how old you are.
Healthy relationships can last a lifetime
It is possible to think you have a serendipitous relationship with someone, but it’s actually not. One that is not serendipitous is one where someone makes you feel bad about yourself or often makes you feel sad. I’ve confused serendipitous relationships with unhealthy relationships which were sometimes toxic relationships. To help with confusion, allow yourself to look at the long history you’ve had with the person.
Best friendships are formed by staying in each other’s lives
If you think you have a serendipitous relationship with someone that continues to depart from you every time you’ve helped them solve another life “problem”, but they never or rarely check in on you and your life, they are not a friend. They may be a “user”, which may lead to extreme hurt feelings or worse. If you can remember them making you feel sad, hurt, angry or strangely confused a bunch of times, even if you’ve spoken with them about it, you may want to distance yourself or seek counseling for your own mental health and peace.
If you are lucky enough to have one, two or more true serendipitous relationships in your life, hold them close. Don’t let them go. Nurture them, grow them and let them bloom. Your life and theirs will be better than you can ever imagine if you do so.
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C.J. (Carolyn) Braden is a regular contributor and editor for Carolyn’s Blooming Creations. She has been featured in numerous media publications such as InStyle Magazine, on HGTV, on Bustle.com, and more. She is the author of the books Georgia McMasters in Amethyst Lake Cemetery, How To Be Yourself: 3 Ways To Help You Being You, and the illustrator for the children’s book Bridging Connections. She is a former classroom teacher that now dedicates her life to educating others on how to live their most healthy, creative and happy life. Learn more about her visiting our About Us page.